Working For The Man

If there's anyone still out there, listen up. I'll have to be brief because I'm at work and surely can't have long before they come for me, with dogs and searchlights and lengths of rubber hose. Here's a summary of what's what.

1) I work for a bank, in an office. Strange, you might say, that I've travelled 11,000 miles to do exactly the same thing as I was doing at home but a brother's gotta eat, gotta pay the rent and that's all there is to it. There is, however, a strong possibility that I'm going to Hell. I dare say I'll see you there.

2) I spent last weekend in Wanganui (pronounced Wonga-nooey) and hereby declare it to be the Stourbridge of New Zealand. I was up doing the meet-the girlfriend's-parents thing, and very nice it was too.

3) Have now settled in to my new flat. My room smells of feet.

4) It's pissing down with rain. Apparently my life is destined to be eked out in perpetual winter. Am thinking of turning Goth.

5) My net access has been severely restricted, hence the lack of updates. but rest assured, my people: I'm still having a wicked time.

I can hear the snarling of Rottweilers and the clomp of jackbooted feet so I'll sign off. But keep reading. I'm still here!